Why Do Men Have Affairs – The Four Top Reasons

savemarriageLove has been a universal value since time immemorial. It is an unwritten law that has governed everyone around the world. It has blossomed into many beautiful things, like the union of a man and woman who are in love with each other. So when we hear a woman shedding tears of betrayal, we end up asking, “Why do men have affairs?”

Below are four paragraphs that explain the reason behind the infidelity of husbands. After each paragraph are a couple of italicized questions that encourage wives to ponder on their marriage and consequently, prevent any straying possibility from happening.


Sometimes, when couples have been together for a long time, they forget to express how much they care for each other. When the wife seems not interested in his activities and ideas anymore, he diverts his attention to the company of his friends, drinking buddies and colleagues. One of these interactions might ignite an extramarital affair.

Have I been consistently showing my interest in the highlights and trivialities of his days? Do I make him aware of my high and low moments?


A man who feels unworthy of his spouse, who hasn’t accepted his true identity and who lacks self-esteem may resort to infidelity. If he can’t handle this healthily, he distracts himself from this negativity like seeing another woman. When he gets acknowledgment and appreciation from her, his ego boosts up and before he knows it, he’s hooked up with his unfaithful feelings. The betrayed wife then sulks and asks, “Why do men have affairs?”

How can I make him feel that I am proud of his talents, abilities and character? Do I make him feel we both deserve each other?


Every man expects something from his wife and their relationship. He may need sexual variety but she prefers only one position. He may want to spend a Friday night watching football with his buddies but she demands they should spend more time together. When these aren’t met, he enjoys the company of those who are more sensitive to his needs.

Do I allow my husband to communicate his desires and preferences in our relationship? Do we meet halfway to satisfy our needs?

Past Events

Some men cheat to resolve their past issues. For example, those who married early never had enough of their teenage years so they’re easily tempted to go out with different women. Some probably grew up with a cheating father and unconsciously, he’s following his deeds. Some might have an ex-girlfriend who two-timed him and wandering from your marriage is the only revenge he knows.

In what ways can I help my husband process and cope up with his hurtful past experiences? Do I empathize with his agony and pain?

Having an extramarital affair is a sin that results to painful consequences. When a husband engages into this, he has committed a sin against all those who believe in his capacity to truly love. However, given the reasons above, it can be deduced that the question, “Why do men have affairs?” can be partly answered by how women sustain the relationship. Remember that both parties must work together for a successful marriage.

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8 Responses to Why Do Men Have Affairs – The Four Top Reasons

  1. Sheila says:

    I dressed up in a very sexy red lace and sheer outfit, with a santa hat. Well my BF of 8 1/2 years had feel asleep in his recliner, I decided to take a picture of myself with his phone and leave him a note in his car so he can see the picture the next day. Lord behold he had a picture of “a woman’s vagi__” on his phone. Next morning I told him about me getting his phone and taking a picture, and I told him the nude picture pop up. That man went crazy. Started cussing me and accusing me of going through his phone, turned the situation completely on me. To me that there is a cheater

  2. Rhonda Dunn says:

    I stood by my husband no sex was not that great, I sometimes just wanted to be held sometimes just talked to.but it always had to be about sex I HELPED HIM GET HIs company started plus raised to kids and work out side of the home I could not count on my fingers and toes of the affairs he has had after 42 years and I have health issues he leaves with someone 14 years younger

  3. jane dole says:

    So sick of articles making it look like it’s the wife’s fault. “She doesn’t pay him enough attention, she doesn’t praise his sensitive little ego enough, she’s not a whore in bed” and on and on. Before the man decides to dip his wick, maybe he should try to work things out with his wife first??

  4. bb says:

    I do everything to please in sexual wise in everything n he still sleeps around n lies I keep asking myself what am I doing wrong n I’m nt doing anything wrong ill please him in bed n won’t even please myself

  5. Kim Jennings says:

    My husband had an affair right after we found out I had congestive heart failure. He said he went to a bar with a friend and met this woman and it just happened.

    When you say men feel neglected that is not the case in my marriage. I have always told my husband that I was grateful for all of his hard work. I have left him little cards to tell him that and little surprises.

    You may be right about the dissatisfaction because I was sick a lot and my husband harassed me on a daily basis to give him a blow job but it was always when he wanted it not when I offered it. It was always on his schedule. I me the wife ended up getting sick and tired of the asking, then putting it off and then if I didn’t do it the next day I was met with you promised me this and that. It literally turned me off.

    The past events might come into play for us as well. I am the only woman he had ever been with and during our marriage he told me a couple two three times that he never got to fuck another woman and wanted to know what it was like. Can you believe the insensitivity of this jerk?

    So the reason I think my husband had an affair was because he wanted to fuck another woman, I was sick a lot, and he felt dissatisfied.

    Too fucking bad little ass baby. I have had to deal with a lot of issues myself but I never went out and cheated and lied to my husband.

    Men who cheat are dicks. I forgave mine for me not him. It sickened me when he told me how he talked to her about me, and how she and I liked the same stuff.

    Since he has been back he has been much more attentive to me, tells me where he’s going and when he’ll be back but every time he leaves I get an awful feeling in my gut.

    He says it makes him uncomfortable when I look as tho I do not believe him when he says where he is going!

    What about me dickhead?

    So men can use all the excuses they want to defend themselves when they have an affair but the bottom line is that they just can’t keep in their pants.

    BTW we have been married 24 years!

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