Do you want your marriage to hold this long? Learn to avoid the common mistakes
People love happy, gray-haired couples walking in the park, dancing together in parties or exploring a new city. It’s inspiring to think that despite all the troubles they’ve been through, they’ve chosen to remain strong and to stick with each other. This ideas is more uplifting nowadays because more and more couples unfortunately lose their commitment after a few years and their union just crumble into pieces.
If you wish for lifetime companionship, you would like to avoid the following common mistakes couples often make in marriage.
Mistake 1: Controlling the Other’s Life
You married your partner for who he/she is, not for someone who you want him/her to be. Give your spouse time and space to grow through the decisions he/she makes. Support your partner with his/her hobbies, thoughts, preferences and interests to maintain a healthy marriage. Controlling your partner is a sign of insecurity, fear and lack of trust. It can also lead to abuse in one way or another. If you see yourself resorting to this tendency, have a self-check session. You might need to resolve suppressed personal or marital issues.
Mistake 2: Holding Grudges
As you live each day together, it’s normal to commit mistakes and have misunderstandings. Once the issue is settled, learn to forgive your partner. Let go of your heartaches and let bygones be bygones. Marriage starts to break apart if you hold grudges so don’t dwell on negative forces. Besides, it’s only one way of keeping yourself down for something not under your control. You will end up always proving your perfection, hating everyone and wasting energy. With your self-destructive nature, you will miss the simple joys of married life.
Mistake 3: Keeping Things to Yourself
Marriage will never be successful if you don’t maintain quality communication at home. If you have something to say, don’t hesitate to do so. Tell your partner about your concerns, interests, dreams, expectations and other ideas. This is a good way of letting your significant other understand what you are thinking and how you are feeling. If you keep things to yourself, your expressions, words, weekend schedule and decisions might be misconstrued. This will lead to wide gaps, unreasonable sulking, arguments and other serious issues.
Mistake 4: Letting the Spark Die
Even if you have lived together for years, make it a habit to continuously do special things for your spouse. Go on weekly dates, buy each other gifts, send love notes, whisper sweet nothings more often and share some laughter over popcorn and a feel-good movie. These simple things are the building blocks of a strong marriage. They keep the magic alive, the magic that made you decide to tie the knot. Don’t let it fade away. Otherwise, marriage starts to focus on mere responsibilities, which can be somehow exhausting.
Couples who work hard for their marriage are rewarded with fulfillment, longevity and growth. This is a continuous project, though, with lots of challenges along the way. There will be times when you’ll succumb to the tendency of committing any of the mistakes above. However, if you know from the start that goodness if what you truly want for your relationship, everything will fall into place.