Signs He is Cheating – Six Noticeable Weird Behaviors of A Cheater

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Still in Love with Ex Lover? You’re Just Six Steps Away from Being Together Again

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Unwillingness to Have Kids – Five Easy Recommendations for Couples

There are many factors for why an individual may not have kids. It may be due to a deficit of wish, reluctance, financial factors or any scientific disability to conceive. In this situation it is not unusual to encounter sadness and a certain worry about having a lifestyle without kids. It is possible to understand to deal by following these recommendations for how to take not having kids.

Show and express your thoughts and emotions

The way you express yourself is personal to you and may include weeping, shouting, having a laugh, writing, discussing or any other of the plenty of types of self-expression. Assess your truth, as it is. It is essential that you are genuine about the world’s conditions. Speak to your spouse that why you don’t want to raise a family at that particular moment. Explain him/her the reasons. It’s always advised to be true to your words and emotions.  If you want some more time then discuss the same with your partner. If you come to know that you will not be able to have children, then you must take that fact before you can progress. Instead of thinking of things that you have or not, focus on what is and what can be.

Think about your future without children

Try imagining your future without children. Put things into perspective. Remember that everyone must deal with redundant lifestyle conditions at times, whether it is loss of life, sickness or unconscious childlessness. With regards to others on this level may help you stumble upon less alone.

Maintain your wellness

Get the appropriate amount of sleep and have a healthy lifestyle. Get into stress relieving exercises and also learn about the levels of sadness. Recognizing not having children is similar to any kind of serious loss that will encounter sadness in its many types. Understanding how sadness exhibits will prepare you to be able to manage it.

Seek psychological support

Getting outside help is very essential to the procedure of working with not having children. There are many places you can go for this kind of support. Find a specialist who can help you in suffering from obstructions to conquering unpleasant feelings. Surf internet and your local magazines for assistance categories for the unwillingly childless. Linking with other individuals who share your encounter can be an excellent resource of comfort. If you fit in with a chapel or other religious organization, then you may be able to receive free guidance from someone you already know and trust. Showing what you are going through to individuals or family members who love and care about you can be a healthy way of working with the sadness of not having children.

Address your concerns

Deal with the cause for unconscious childlessness to be able to fully adapt to a lifestyle without children.  If you want children but have a reluctant associate, the decision to not have children can put a lot of pressure on the connection. It may be difficult to avoid concealing anger towards your associate, and you will need to restore the connection once you understand to deal with not having children. Work through connection concerns with the help of a partner’s specialist. If you are unable to conceive, then it is essential of you to not place any responsibility on yourself or your associate. Take time to restore in reality and psychologically from any medications you and/or your associate may have sustained and understand that the pressure from those therapies is likely further complicating your ability to deal with not having children.

Unwillingness to start a family with children often creates a lot of pressure and turmoil between wedded couples. Sometimes the unwillingness is related to a hectic career lifestyle, medical issues and sometimes it can be related to financial status or family problems. But always remember to address and face this issue with loads of love and concern.

Always remember that giving birth to a child not only brings a lot of responsibilities but also brings with it the joy of parenthood. Couples should always be open and happy about the changes and responsibilities that come after childbirth.

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Division of Household Responsibilities – 5 Easy Methods for Partners to Try

Division of household responsibilities between partners is something which is very difficult to work out. The major concern, however, is often, who is to do what. Typically, the lady covers most of the family tasks, and the man covers the bill payments, etc.

Here are 5 easy methods for couples for dividing up household chores that will guarantee all the chores get done, with love and affection.

Clear your own things

Clearing your own things not only reduces the problem of messiness but also makes a person accountable. If every individual makes it a habit of clearing up their own things, then this implies that everyone is contributing to reducing the problem. Therefore, if you create a clutter of any type, you need to do your best to declutter it. Always do your own work and make it a habit. This will keep a lot less work for later. You can think of keeping separate laundry bags for yourself, children and your partner. Make it a habit of putting your dirty clothes, inner wears in laundry bags. In your wardrobes, you can create separate shelves for you and your spouse and arrange the clothes and accessories. Get nice cloth boxes to keep your inner wears and any other accessories in your wardrobe. This avoids messing and also gives a clean look to your wardrobe.

Divide Your Household Tasks

Divide tasks according to passions and capabilities. Make a list of all your household tasks. Include things which one hates, and the other tolerates. If both despise the same chore, then figure out a way to get the task done or think of doing it together as a team. Assign your name and your partner’s name in each task. Display this chart either in your kitchen or any other location as per convenience. Both spouses should immediately start working on this chart. Keep adding tasks every day and strike off things that are done. Baby sitting task if applicable, should also be included in your household responsibilities list.

Review Each Other’s Responsibilities

Let one another know what the coming week’s time is going to be like any upcoming events, get together parties, special occasions, things that need to be done, etc. And then decide who is going to do what. Sit down to discuss objectives and carry it up. Discuss the unfastened task or process. You can also keep some fine levied on unaccomplished tasks. The one who hasn’t performed should pay an amount as a fine to the other partner. Keep the money in individual piggy banks and later utilize the money to buy any household things. In this way you bring fun and happiness in your daily conduct.

Always complement each other

Never ask for help instead always do your own shares. If one of you doesn’t perform around the house, try and discover together why there is such unwillingness. Reasons can be many and in many cases men show more unwillingness than women. Accusing your partner for what hasn’t been achieved or completed is just spending energy. Be versatile and allow your partner to achieve a process in his/her own way. Always compliment your partner instead of complaining. This will act as a motivating factor for both of you. Nagging on the other hand will only make the things worse.

Consider keeping a Domestic Help

There will be periods when one individual’s assigned task is just too big and the other individual has almost no time or trend to help them. In this situation, you may want to seek the services of individuals to help you around the house. Working couples do face this problem in their daily life. Keep a domestic maid who can help you with the daily activities and then you can easily divide all other remaining activities between you and your partner like bill payments, grocery, shopping, visiting your children’s school, gardening, etc.

Division of household responsibilities should be done to avoid conflicts and issues between you and your partner. Talk and discuss each other’s activities and responsibilities.  Chores around the home should always be considered as distributed obligations. Always remember that marriage brings a lot of responsibilities. You should always be open and happy about the changes and responsibilities that come after marriage.

Household responsibilities are a part of our life. By following these five methods, you will not only have less argument but also you would never have to do chores that you really don’t like. The same applies to your spouse as well.

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Four Marriage Values that Keep Your Marriage Intact

Do you ever ponder why you behave this or that way in marriage? You may have a number of reasons for a certain behavior but they can all be summed up by what you believe in. Your values are guiding principles or standards that you consider worthwhile. They determine how much time you spend for the family, how strong your bond is and how you treat your partner. They are your marital cornerstones.

Values usually differ from one person to another but in marriage, the following must be held on to by couples to successfully keep the relationship going:

Respect

No two people are similar in all aspects. Even if you say that you married someone who shares the same hobbies and priorities with you, you will gradually find out how different you are when you start living under the same roof. At some points in the future, you will have different preferences in child rearing, in your future plans and even in watching TV programs. However, if you maintain respect for one another, you will be able to adapt with each other’s personalities and appreciate who you truly are.

Responsibility

When you sign your marriage contract, you embraced the responsibilities as one of the heads in the family. This covers addressing the survival needs such as providing food on the table, paying the bills and sending kids to school. This also includes the emotional side like being effective parents, supporting your partner’s pursuits and consoling each other in times of grief. If you take away this value, your marriage won’t certainly survive with immaturity and selfishness.

Forgiveness

Marriage normally undergoes misunderstandings, annoyances and anger. If you dwell on these moments or if you keep grudges, you lead yourself into the path of bitterness. To keep yourself emotionally healthy for your own sake and for everyone in the family, you must value forgiveness. Through it, you won’t be wasting your time and energy for uncontrollable things in the past. Also, learn to ask for forgiveness. Show remorse for any hurt you’ve caused to your spouse. Prove that you are sorry for the consequences of your wrongdoing.

Commitment

The value of commitment means sticking to your marriage regardless of where it is heading. This can be easy when everything is smooth-sailing but when the boat encounters the threats of big waves,  it can be grueling. With commitment, however, you’re confident that you’ll make it through huge stressors and petty challenges of the journey. The thought that someone’s with you through thick and thin brings the feeling of security and inspiration.

To check whether you and your partner have the same values, list the things that you hold in the highest regard and examine them if they are helping your marriage grow. Ask yourselves, “Are they the ones you truly need?” “Are there things you must change?” and “Are there other values you must prioritize?” Then as you go on with your lives, make sure that your decisions are aligned to the values you’ve agreed on.

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Having Infrequent Sex Problem in Marriage? – Try These Five Easy Ways

Marriages are made in heaven and celebrated between couples. Remaining in a sexless wedding is challenging and goes through a lot of psychological and emotional issues. Sexless marriages are very typical among today’s couples and the thought of denial are extreme and gradually develops up over time. Sexless marriages are more vulnerable to end in divorce due to the bad thoughts which get created within a relationship. Sexless marriages happen in a wide range of reasons like gap in communication, lack of time for each other, issues related to family, arguments, stress and disagreements and reasons are endless.

Here are five easy ways to help you get over your sexless marriage issues.

Talk to each other

A satisfied wedding is a lengthy discussion which always seems too brief. Most people don’t get married to someone they can’t talk about with. An excellent discussion is when you are both causing the discussion. When you are having an excellent discussion with your partner, try talking about topics like passions, planning a vacation, your early years, films and movie reviews, weekend plans, any new ideas, etc. Avoid topics on household chores, money, parents, family, health, neighbors, etc.

Understand each other’s needs

Women like flowers, evening dinners, surprise gifts, etc. If your spouse is working, you can try returning home early and plan an evening dinner for her. If she is a homemaker, provide her with a hand to help with the household chores. This way she will be stress free and relaxed. And once she will have fewer responsibilities, she will be more open to journeys in bed. Recognize and understand your husband’s physical and emotional needs. Once your husband comes back from work, make him a good cup of coffee and discuss with him about his day at the office, projects, future assignments, etc. If possible go out for a refreshing evening walk. In this way both of you will feel relaxed and pampered.

Bring a Change in Your Sex-Lifestyle

Add a little secret and fun to your sex-lifestyle. Get into the feelings. Read out erotic stories to your partner. Watch some funny sex videos and play some sex themed games together. Try getting naughty with your partner and discuss your sexual fantasies. You can also think of doing some other activities like massaging, strip teasing and taking a hot tub bath together.

Creating a Sex-Schedule

Discuss with your partner about a perfect sex schedule. Your schedule should include having sex once, twice or thrice in a week. If your partner wants to have sex a lot more often than you do, bargain somewhere in the center and then maintain it. Create sex times and routine these times on your schedule. Do not put your sex-life aside due to disagreements and fights. Resolve your fights and get back to your sex schedule.

Exhaustion

Exhaustion is typical after being a parent. Your children become your priorities and always keep you up on your toes. You can think about hiring a maid to look after your baby and house. This way you will feel relaxed. Eight hours of sleep is a must so try getting into bed early. Get your partner to do the same. And once you are in the feelings again, having sex during the day or during the early hours of the morning will help both of you to overcome exhaustion along with sexual pleasures.

A long-term marriage relationship with a good amount of interaction can get you back the old courtship times. Do remember that loads of love and open communication is the main key for any long lasting marriage. Communicate your desires and take small risks to optimize your sex-life. Don’t let your memories of leading a happy marriage to remain only as memories. Keep the sex up! A successful relationship is a give and take process. One partner should give and the other should accept and it’s vice versa.

A wedding in disaster doesn’t actually mean it’s on the threshold of divorce and everything is over.  If you include these five steps in your daily life, you would be able to enhance the relationship with your partner and live a tale with a satisfied conclusion.

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Four Common Mistakes in Marriage – Realize This Before It’s Too Late!

Do you want your marriage to hold this long? Learn to avoid the common mistakes

People love happy, gray-haired couples walking in the park, dancing together in parties or exploring a new city. It’s inspiring to think that despite all the troubles they’ve been through, they’ve chosen to remain strong and to stick with each other. This ideas is more uplifting nowadays because more and more couples unfortunately lose their commitment after a few years and their union just crumble into pieces.

If you wish for lifetime companionship, you would like to avoid the following common mistakes couples often make in marriage.

Mistake 1: Controlling the Other’s Life

You married your partner for who he/she is, not for someone who you want him/her to be. Give your spouse time and space to grow through the decisions he/she makes. Support your partner with his/her hobbies, thoughts, preferences and interests to maintain a healthy marriage. Controlling your partner is a sign of insecurity, fear and lack of trust. It can also lead to abuse in one way or another. If you see yourself resorting to this tendency, have a self-check session. You might need to resolve suppressed personal or marital issues.

Mistake 2: Holding Grudges

As you live each day together, it’s normal to commit mistakes and have misunderstandings. Once the issue is settled, learn to forgive your partner. Let go of your heartaches and let bygones be bygones. Marriage starts to break apart if you hold grudges so don’t dwell on negative forces. Besides, it’s only one way of keeping yourself down for something not under your control. You will end up always proving your perfection, hating everyone and wasting energy. With your self-destructive nature, you will miss the simple joys of married life.

Mistake 3: Keeping Things to Yourself

Marriage will never be successful if you don’t maintain quality communication at home. If you have something to say, don’t hesitate to do so. Tell your partner about your concerns, interests, dreams, expectations and other ideas. This is a good way of letting your significant other understand what you are thinking and how you are feeling. If you keep things to yourself, your expressions, words, weekend schedule and decisions might be misconstrued. This will lead to wide gaps, unreasonable sulking, arguments and other serious issues.

Mistake 4: Letting the Spark Die

Even if you have lived together for years, make it a habit to continuously do special things for your spouse. Go on weekly dates, buy each other gifts, send love notes, whisper sweet nothings more often and share some laughter over popcorn and a feel-good movie. These simple things are the building blocks of a strong marriage. They keep the magic alive, the magic that made you decide to tie the knot. Don’t let it fade away. Otherwise, marriage starts to focus on mere responsibilities, which can be somehow exhausting.

Couples who work hard for their marriage are rewarded with fulfillment, longevity and growth. This is a continuous project, though, with lots of challenges along the way. There will be times when you’ll succumb to the tendency of committing any of the mistakes above. However, if you know from the start that goodness if what you truly want for your relationship, everything will fall into place.

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Infidelity In Marriage – Recognize the Signs and Deal With It Wisely

Knowing that your husband has been unfaithful to you can be a traumatic experience. Dealing with this issue takes a lot of courage and patience, and not one solution would work for everyone. There are various reasons why a person would become unfaithful to his partner, and therefore, these reasons must be addressed first in order to solve the problem. So in case you will be faced with infidelity issues in your married life, then you have to look for the best solution for you and your partner.

Dealing with Emotional Infidelity

Infidelity, by definition would mean having a physical intimacy with other person outside of your marriage. This might be common among men, but a lot of women now are also becoming unfaithful to their spouses. Other than physical intimacy, it can also take the form of emotional intimacy, something that does not involve any sexual or physical contact. Others would say that emotional intimacy should not be taken seriously since there is no physical and sexual interaction involved. Well the truth is, emotional infidelity will sooner or later lead to physical and sexual infidelity, and it is actually more difficult to detect because of its non-physical in nature. Therefore, if you suspect your spouse having an emotional intimacy with someone else, then you must take this matter seriously before it can lead to something else.

Signs of Infidelity in Marriage

The number one sign that your spouse is having an affair with someone else is his strange behavior. If you suspect him to be leaving your house even in the middle of the night and goes home at dawn, then beware, he could be meeting up with someone else. Obviously, if your husband is into emotional infidelity, then he won’t be doing these things. But try checking his mobile phone or laptop, and you might see in there his conversations with another woman that looked like they are more than just friends. So even if they have not met in person yet, you must immediately take proper actions to address this before everything is too late.

Is Divorce the Solution?

Divorce may be an option in resolving infidelity in marriage, but this is definitely not the best solution. Remember that you are bound to a lifetime commitment with your partner, and if you have kids, then this will definitely affect them a lot. So before you decide to file for a divorce after you found out that your husband is having an affair with someone else, make sure that you first sit and talk with your husband and decide what you can do in order to resolve these issues. Ask his reasons for doing such things and address these things. If he tells you that you lack time with him, then perhaps it’s about time that you give up some of the things that’s keeping you busy. Although rebuilding trust in a relationship is very difficult, but going through the process of divorce is much more difficult. Aside from being time consuming, it would cost you a lot, and most of all, the pain and trauma that it would bring to your kids is heartbreaking.

Consider Your Kids

As previously mentioned, your kids will be the ones that will be greatly affected in case you decide to end the marriage. But if your kids are already old enough to understand the things that have been going on between you and your spouse, then it is best that you discuss the reasons why you are in conflict. This is especially true if one of your kids have seen your spouse with another woman. So explain to your kids what happened and as much as possible, avoid badmouthing your spouse in front of your kids. After all, he is still their father, and no one can change that.

Solution

1. Visit a Counselor

A counselor probably can help if you and your spouse cannot resolve the conflict on your own. Counselors are expert when it comes to resolving infidelity issues in marriage, so they would be able to give you the best advices in addressing this issue. They will also teach you how to rebuild your trust for your husband and prevent these things to happen again in the future.

Do remember though, that counselor is just another human being. You can’t expect him/her to take care of the problem for you. In the end, it’s up to both of you to overcome the problem.

2. Using Self Help Book

Despite thousands of different circumstances, usually the core of the problems in a marriage is surprisingly similar to each other, thus it’s possible to develop self-help book that can help couples overcoming their marriage problem. This method is certainly useful if your partner has given up and you’re the only one who’s been trying to fix the marriage.

We are only human beings, so we are prone to make mistakes. Sometimes, we need other people to tell us the mistakes that we did and how to correct these.

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Stick to Being a Couple – Four Activities You Can Do Together

You and your spouse are called a couple because you are supposed to be linked by a special kind of affection. If you prefer to do things on your own, you pull yourself away from this gelling force. If you continuously do this, it can be the start of a wide gap, which can cause a multitude of negative consequences such as infidelity, lack of attachment and unsatisfied marital needs.

From the paragraph above, it can be inferred that to strengthen your marriage bond, all you need to do is to regularly hang out with your partner. This will give you quality time to know and be known, appreciate and be appreciated, cherish and be cherished. Below are four common activities you must ensure you do together most of the time.

Eat Together

When you’re eating together, you prefer to talk about pleasant things. Don’t you notice that when you fight over dinner or talk about heartaches while eating, you lose your appetite? It’s because food has always been connected with happy thoughts. That’s why couples who go food tripping at different restaurants don’t only satisfy their cravings but also bank on wonderful memories. You don’t have to spend too much for this, though. Eating together at home at least twice a day is more than enough.

Sleep Together

The most sacred and exciting thing about being married can be done in the bedroom. Hence, there’s no reason for you to dislike going to sleep together, cuddling each other in bed and having a short intimate conversation before traveling to dreamland. You spend one third of your day in slumber and even if you’re unconscious during this stage, you must see to it that you’re comfortable sharing the bed with each other. For if you’re uneasy with your spouse when you’re both asleep, how much more when you’re awake?

Plan Together

It’s natural that your relationship will be challenged by your career, personal priorities and individual preferences. These usually become hindrances in spending quality time with one another. To prevent this from happening, plan together and adjust with your likes and dislikes. You can also agree to compromise once in a while. After all, love requires sacrifice to be with the most special person in your life.

Pray Together

Seeing a couple or a family attending the holy mass has always been a heartwarming scene. If spirituality somehow directs your relationship, make it a point to visit church or pray together for enlightenment. Those who do this often say it brings them great, positive energies. If you’re not the religious type, allot time for shared personal reflections about how life is treating you as a couple. Being serious at times may let you feel more grateful for all the blessings in your marriage.

Doing things together all the time is unhealthy, though. You also have to give yourself some space for individual freedom and personal choices. But once you decide to enter the sacrament of matrimony, you must understand that you’re giving up a big part of it. When you sign the marriage contract, you agree to use ‘we’ more often than ‘I.”

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Five Common Problems in Marriage – Prepare Yourself

I Do: do you have what it takes to keep the "until death do us part" vow?

If you’re wearing the wedding ring soon, here’s a secret for you: one of the proactive ways of having a smooth sailing married life is anticipating the possible hurdles you will encounter.

It’s comparable to preparing for a national licensure exam. You get pointers from those who already made it and you try to equip yourself with necessary knowledge and skills that will guide you in resolving the stumbling blocks. Of course, this isn’t a guarantee that you’ll have a successful union since everything will be tested once you’re there. But somehow, you can make use of what you know in a positive way.

Financial Problems

Making the ends meet is a common problem couples face. It can even totally wreck marriage as this problem can lead to loud arguments, insecurities, outbursts of anger and other more serious issues if not dealt with appropriately. Money brings in the basic necessities to the family. If the couple can’t address their need for food, shelter, clothing, health and children’s education, relationships are somehow affected.

Third Parties

Unfaithfulness arises because of dissatisfaction in marriage. Causes of dissatisfaction varies in every relationship. It can be personality differences, sickening habits like nagging and irrational blaming, lack of attention and care and even poor hygiene. If they try to resolve it by fulfilling their needs through another person, they’ll be in a great trouble. The aggrieved will lose trust and confidence in their partner. The feeling of betrayal is just too painful to be easily forgiven.

Physical Problems

What makes marriage a unique relationship is it legally allows you to bond with your partner in bed. However, some people are negligent with their partner’s physical needs. They feed themselves with much work that when they get home, they’re too tired for some cuddling. This setup causes lack of attachment, a very important factor in marriage. It causes a great deal of dissatisfaction and it seriously affects the union.

Boredom

Love is sweet in its first stage because the spark is overflowing. But as years pass by, everything seems to be too trite and familiar. At times, it leads to feeling of contempt and boredom. Couples who fail to keep the fire burning are usually those who are only committed to the happy side of marriage. They forget that one of the greatest challenges in married life is discovering something new and interesting in their partner’s life every day.

Parenting Issues

Being a parent entails great responsibilities. Couples encounter many challenges in between changing diapers to sending their children to universities. At times they have different preferences in upbringing. One may spoil the kids with too much video games while the other would love them to value reading. One might decide to send the kids to a private school while the other might be contented with the free education offered by the government. These simple things can cause niggling arguments at home.

But don’t frown at married life because of these issues. Though they sometimes destroy marriage, they offer the promise of strength too if both parties are mature and wise enough to handle them. If you believe in your partner and in your love for each other, you’ll overcome all these trials and be proud of what you have.

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Surviving Infidelity in Marriage – Five Ways to Heal Your Heart and The Relationship

If you see this, remember that this is NOT the end of the world

A number of couples have undergone marriage counseling because of extramarital conflicts. The process they undergo is so painful they need professional help. Nobody can blame them if they resort to that option. When a marriage is suffering from infidelity issues, everything around them is affected. The couple ends up fighting, blaming and cursing. All their wonderful moments are turned upside down.

However, impossible as it may seem, a marriage on the brink of separation can still be mended in due time. Below are five encouraging tips for couples who’d like to hold on despite the pain.

The Honest Culprit

Dishonesty in marriage cannot be resolved with another act of dishonesty. When confronting an infidelity issue, the betrayer must confess everything and explain the reasons. Was it because of marriage dissatisfaction? Was it because of irresistible temptations? Was it because of unresolved past issues? The unfaithful must express everything so both can help each other in resolving and bringing it to an end. He or she must be sincerely sorry about the pain it has caused the partner.

The Choice to Forgive

There are no shortcuts when it comes to forgiving a person. It will probably take months or years for the aggrieved to accept and let go of the truth. Demanding for space is normal, too. Withdrawal symptom is a defense mechanism to cope up with pain. However, to save the marriage, one must choose to forgive the other in due time. This is the only way of relieving the pain in the heart.

Going On Dates Again

When both parties are ready, they can go on dates with each other again. They can go for a walk, have dinner at a restaurant, watch a wonderful movie together, etc. They should not rush things; they must take one day at a time. When the moment that both of them are convinced that everything has fallen into place, they may agree on how they’ll take their relationship from there on. They must promise each other never to repeat the same mistakes all over again.

The Symbolic Scar

Unfaithfulness doesn’t kill a person, it only leaves a scar. It represents an act that will never be forgotten but it also provides an opportunity for a person to heal oneself. A scar doesn’t bleed anymore. Even if you pinch it many times, it won’t hurt like before. It may trigger sad memories but once the couple has managed to let go of their resentment, it will just remind them that what doesn’t kill make them stronger.

Zipping the Mouth

Unless the issue is recurring, they should not bring up the infidelity problem every time they have a misunderstanding. There’s nothing they can do with history but the present and the future are still in their hands. If they still dig the past, it simply means they haven’t fully resolved the infidelity issue. They must work on this because it is detrimental to their self-esteem and confidence.

The process of patching things up after an infidelity issue is not smooth-sailing at all. The couple must learn to forgive and trust again to establish a stronger relationship.

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The Do’s and Don’ts of Winning Back Your Boyfriend’s Heart

Everyone says a breakup is a disheartening experience. You feel a stab of pain in your heart. There’s an indescribable mixture of negative emotions within and moving a step forward is the least interesting option.  Oftentimes, you feel the drive to hold on, to fight back and win the love again.

Though the motivation is there, the ways on how to win back the love is more difficult to carry on. It’s all because you tend to act based on how you feel, not on how you think. To make things simpler for you, here are the guidelines to help you get your heart’s desire.

Guideline No. 1: Don’t beg.

Beggars who chase after you gives you a feeling of either pity or annoyance. You trigger the same emotions if you’re down on your knees to plead and say, “Please come back to me. I will do anything for you.” Because this is not attractive, chances are you’re pushing your ex even farther. It makes him realize that he just made the right decision.

Guidelines No. 2: Don’t bug.

Only a few people have a heart for bugs. They are usually being avoided or put out by insecticides. In the same way, if you bug your ex with text messages, calls and emails, you’ll get the same treatment.  Don’t suffocate him with too much affection. Always saying “I still love you” or “I can’t help but think of you” are not the best lines in this stage. Give him space. He needs that. You need that even more.

Guideline No. 3: Don’t get wasted.

If you think booze will help you forget the pain, you’re right. But still, it won’t solve the problem. If going to bars and getting drunk is your best option, you’re making your life miserable and hopeless. Though it will get the attention of your ex-boyfriend, it will also make him think you’re not independent enough to manage your problems. This idea isn’t sexy for him at all. It will only drive him to look for someone who can take care of herself in difficult situations.

Guideline No. 4: Do find yourself.

When you’re boyfriend turns his back on you, it means one-less person to take care of. Hence, you can use that time and energy for your own growth. Look for a healthy diversion that will develop your talent, skill or interest. This method of turning lemon into lemonade is an act of a mature woman, something that will create a good impression on your ex.

Guideline No. 5: Do think reasonably.

Try to ponder what went wrong in the relationship. Was it because of personality differences? Was it because of another party? Was it because you didn’t have sufficient time for each other? Knowing the main cause of the breakup will bring up ideas on how to fix the broken pieces.

Guideline No. 6: Do communicate.

All problems are resolved by communication. When you’ve already calm down, talk to him heartily. Share the pain and discuss the possibility of getting back together. If your ex still cares for you, you would know right there and then if being in each other’s arms again is still possible.

If things don’t turn out the way you expect it, don’t blame yourself. It’s just telling you that there’s beauty in sunsets, that there are other things in store for you and that the best is yet to come.

No BreakUp is Irreversible!


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